Healing Intergenerational Trauma

Breaking the Cycle & Healing Intergenerational Trauma

Human beings are shaped by more than just our immediate experiences. The traumas that our ancestors endured can echo through the generations, shaping our beliefs, behaviors, and emotional well-being. Families whose histories include war, genocide, slavery, displacement, colonization, or other forms of systematic oppression experience Intergenerational Trauma. It profoundly impacts individuals, family units, and even entire communities. Unresolved trauma from one generation trickles down to the next through family narratives, stories, and behaviours. Children unconsciously absorb their parents’ and caregivers’ emotional pain. They grow up and live with it long after their parents pass away. In turn, they pass the trauma down to their own children. Our practice is seeing an increasing number of clients requiring therapy for breaking this cycle and healing intergenerational trauma.

How Intergenerational Trauma Trickles

Here is an example of how intergenerational trauma transmits. If your father’s explosive anger left no space for anyone else’s emotions, you might have learned to avoid him by making your presence “invisible”. When you faced his wrath, he might have harshly told you to stop sniveling and crying. This shut down your ability to process such powerful and complex feelings, so you internalized them. Not being good enough became part of your identity. Decades later, your adult self suffers from low self-esteem, mistrust, and unhelpful coping mechanisms. The trauma could have altered your brain’s functioning and structure, and regulation of your stress hormones. All of these genetically predispose future generations to stress-related disorders.

What Intergenerational Trauma Looks Like

People suffering from trauma exhibit heightened levels of anxiety, depression, anger, or a sense of constant threat. They may also struggle with low self-esteem, unhealthy identity issues, or difficulties forming secure attachments. Unresolved trauma can also shape maladaptive coping mechanisms and self-destructive behaviors like substance abuse, self-harm, aggression, or avoidance and isolation. Intergenerational trauma can strain family dynamics and interpersonal relationships causing conflict, emotional isolation, or difficulties in trust and intimacy. The shame, fear, sadness, or resentment are so ingrained into their identity. They don’t recognize themselves without that sack of rocks. Many individuals only seek therapy after these burdens completely exacerbated them.

Therapy for Healing Intergenerational Trauma

Therapy for healing intergenerational trauma begins with an exploration of your family history and lineage. Once your therapist finds its genesis, they will help you see how the current problems did not start with you. They were part of a much larger issue within your family, perhaps for generations. You had no choice or control over your circumstances, and you were not to blame.

Recognizing and acknowledging its existence is the very first step and a key milestone for healing intergenerational trauma. Releasing this payload which you had been carrying all your life can bring an expansive sense of freedom. From there, your therapist will help you absorb all of this to a somatic level so you can slow down automated knee-jerk reactions, and safely discard the familiar, but harmful, coping mechanisms.

Resources For Healing Intergenerational Trauma: 

The weight of intergenerational trauma is undeniably heavy. Engaging a trauma-informed therapist you have a good rapport with is a very important start. The healing process is unique for every individual, and what works for one person may not work for another. Your therapist can help you access tools and processes that resonate and work for you. These specialists can guide you through layers of inherited pain and help you develop healthy coping behaviour. In addition, there are many things you can do yourself to enhance your healing journey.  

Living intentionally, and educating yourself on the impact of intergenerational trauma can help you understand and break unhelpful familial patterns of behaviour. Education can also empower you to challenge the status quo. You can develop resilience by engaging in self-care, mindfulness, exercise, and even creative outlets. In addition, cultivating a strong support network can help you ride through the emotional highs and lows. Sharing your experiences with those you trust, and connecting with community support organizations can shore you up with validation, connection, and a sense of belonging. Fostering collective healing can help you learn from others and remind you that you are not alone in your struggles.

If it feels right, take full advantage of ancestral healing or cultural ceremonies within your community. Acknowledging and honouring the pain of your ancestors can facilitate healing across generations. And most of all, be patient with yourself. The healing process takes time and can progress in waves. You will find practicing self-love and self-compassion to be foundational in your quest for healing intergenerational trauma, breaking the cycle, and reshaping the narrative of your family’s history.

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